I almost minored in Feminist theory at my big ten university, so I guess I feel slightly okay posting about something we used to study and debate in class (albeit 10 years ago -- aging myself). Except now it's affecting my relationship and is not just some standpoint between different level of feminists.
I'm aware that there are actually some feminists who believe pornography is complimentary to feminist theory. Women benefit financially from porn/stripping/prostitution, etc. I've never been one of these feminists. It was our duty in class to read articles and journals on both sides of the spectrum so I'm aware they exist but, and I will not apologize for this, how can such easily accessible vagina shots, and anal sex by women usually with augmented bodies benefit our society? How can men as a gender learn to respect us, the WHOLE us including most importantly our brains when they're jerking off to this shit on the daily - and sometimes more? It's objectifying us for our bodies, for their 'quicker release.' I seem to have more a problem with the videos than of the stills, as I do somewhat believe that playboy for example isn't so damaging.
My "boyfriend," and I say that because we've been on and off for years, seems to have some type of addiction to porn. Freeporn.com even. Are we just the intellectually superior gender because we don't NEED something visual in front of our faces in order to orgasm? I find this angering and frustrating. He says if he has to sit and think about something to get him off, he'd chaff himself because it'd take hours. And it seems like there is so much porn out there that it's a losing battle to argue that it's creating an objectification in his/their brains. I read a study once years and years ago that proved that men who watched porn were more apt to be violent towards women then men who don't. It's scary to think that if he's the average guy, how many others are doing just as he does and how it's morphing their brains. My best friend is currently fighting her husband on this same issue since she discovered his stills of nude (what seemed to appear as) 18 year old girls on his droid. This was the third time something like that had happened. It's given her a complex and I've never met a woman who tries harder to please her man in the bedroom.
I live in Minnesota (not FROM here) and earlier this year there was a story about a teenage boy in high school who had tweeted a semi-famous porn star asking her to the prom. Many people felt that because he had a slight mental challenge this was okay. I was the only one in groups of individuals who found this disturbing because I guess I thought of it like if he were my son, would I be okay with that? Absolutely fucking not. I was the freak in these conversations, the "prude." And I'm definitely anything but. I guess I just don't understand and feel alone on this issue. It couldn't have always been this way...right? I'm a liberal feminist but I just...am failing in this battle over big tits, seemingly 18 year old porn stars, freeporn.com and the like. Thoughts?